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Thursday, November 19, 2015

How to be Creative and Still be a Great Parent!









As a parent , you know that children are always going to need structure and a disciplined life.

And as an artist , we are not known as very structured or  have a disciplined life style.


But being the creative people we are and wanting to be a  great parent, sometimes everything has to be tweaked just a little bit in order to raise productive children into productive adults.



When I think about this , I just go aghhhhhhh! I am still a parent and I am also a grandmother.  Raising two girls was hard enough with my creative life style. But I made two specific rules at my home.  Do your assignments and get your education. Because once you have an education ,it can never be taken away.


I can remember my husband and I working sometimes into the late hours of the night to finish orders for customers.  We  were often tired ,but we  finished them . I can remember my children popping in and asking questions , and sometimes helping but, they always had her assignments done and ready for the next, day.



Recently my youngest daughter , her children and husband have moved back in with me, because of my husband's illness, the cycle has come full circle.   So being a little bit wiser and calmer , we have set up some new rules and guidelines to make her children and my grand  children more productive and responsible people.




I am going to list the rules that we use with my grandchildren, but  before we ever set any rules we sat down with them and told them one  important thing.

There are no excuses: the first thing we discussed with the children is the fact that nothing is impossible for them to accomplish. 
They can make good grades by studying, asking for help on things they don't understand, and finishing their assignment . But the most important thing  is being diligent on all things.
That means being determined, whether difficult or easy, follow through with the task.
No one was born to be an Einstein, we  all are  brought into this world knowing few things . And these few things are how to nurse , make noise , and excrete. we don't asked you to be all A's students, but we ask you to set your goals to do the grades that are expected of them.


So here are the rules:


1.Homework and studying: These are done everyday at our house after they get home. At the same place,  every time. Usually at the kitchen table so every child knows it is what expected of them.


All parents should be involved with their students studying or homework. That is another good reason to have the children sit at the kitchen table . While you are cooking dinner an adult can help and make sure they are at task. 

Every child should also have a parent who has knowledge of a each child's  schedule :classroom assignments and or assessments. For instance, which test are on what day and what assignment is due on what day.

Most  schools have a  website to go check these assignments out and schedules. Teachers will list lessons plans and schedules  on their school websites for parents.

Make a schedule for routine  dates of assignment, turn ins and tests. This  schedule should be done for each child.

2. Don't tell them they are genius'.  Stop telling your children they are wonderfully smart and bartering with them to make perfect scores. Good grades should be considered natural and expected by all.
 When you give children a fantastic reward every time they make an A on a test ,they will expect rewards all the time. Then when the rewardsw stop they will stop.

When you tell your child they are smarter than the average child this sets them up for failure.

They think everything is going to be easy and  when its not they cannot take the let down of losing  praise or the spot light. So they become defiant and give up.



Children should be told that getting good grades is hard work but builds great character and not everything is life is a win , win.

This way they can cope when times get tuff and they will not complete a task because they are not number ONE.

When my children have good grades I always tell them I am proud for their effort and not giving up. They are successful because they stayed the course. 


3. Always encourage through love and understanding, but always tell them when they have done something wrong and give consequences.



If a child has an excuse for everything he or she does wrong , behavior escalates and sometimes character of children get out of control.

It may devastate you to punish your child but later it will devastate you if he commits a crime or becomes a needy adult.











4. Children also need a chore. whether its helping with the laundry, feeding the pets, washing the dishes. They need a daily or weekly responsibility. And they need this consistently. This gets them in the habit of being productive and responsible. And it becomes habit , so it is instilled in them to continuously be responsible.



Being an artist , is sometimes hard to be consistent, but being an successful artist is also being a: consistent, responsible and productive artist. You have acquired this gift being a successful artist . And you, as an artist,  have  developed yourself into a successful artist in certain consistent and determined  scenarios, even if we don't know it.

So pass it on ,your strategies to your children and it will give them the opportunity to be successful and to become a productive adult.

 This is the most wonderful gift or legacy you can give to your child.
So hope this will insight you to continue to be creative and    the answer to having a  creative life style and still be a wonderful parent.

 Good luck! And keep being creative.





 

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